Entre être et ne pas être

Carmelita Siwa’s first solo work, Entre être et ne pas être, was born out of the choreographer’s awareness of the impact of unspoken socio-cultural obligations on her identity as a young woman in her country, Benin. The eldest of four daughters, brought up under a strict religious upbringing, the choreographer saw, as she became an adult, the weight that weighed on her shoulders: setting a good example, fulfilling her duties, demonstrating responsibility – in short, living up to family and social expectations to the detriment of her own aspirations. Feeling oppressed, as if trapped by the gaze of others and what people will say, she comes to question her own identity. 

« I’ve often asked myself: « What should I be or not be? To please others and sacrifice my happiness and freedom? But who am I really? Myself or what others expect of me? Who do I really want to become? How can I move beyond this world of pretence, lies and masquerades and finally decide for myself? 

In a costume symbolising the tension between appearances – make-up, white fabric – and the being, still lurking in the darkness, the dancer first unfurls in a space delimited by four lanterns, which form as many beacons, constraints, as glimmers of hope illuminating the path to a life finally chosen, despite adversity: that of an artist.

Recorded on 14 May 2021, Institut Français du Bénin, Cotonou.

Sources : Dossier Compagnie Arts Ca’Danser, interview with Carmelita Siwa, by Anne Décoret-Ahiha, 4 October 2023.

This video was registered thanks to the support of the Institut Français, the Metropole de Lyon and the City of Lyon as part of the 2023 – 2024 project “Development of a digital resource on African choreographic creation and a tool for artistic training, art criticism and cultural mediation in Benin and Togo” led by Dr Anne Décoret-Ahiha.